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Suicide

Rainbows and storms

Suicide-03

I want to drown

in the ocean of blood

I am bleeding

The wound on my wrist

is deep

I wanna leave quickly

I have already suffered too much

The pain killed me

but it never defeated me

 And today I say, goodbye pain

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Posted by on July 19, 2015 in poetry, suicide

 

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Living with depression: entry # 1

     worried-girl-413690_640

 Depression is a state where a person feels low and lethargic all the time. I have spend my whole life with depression. I was emotionally abused all the time and I let the depression take over me. I never really understood the meaning of depression until few days ago although I am suffering from it for years.

I depressed state I feel like it is the end of the  world, all hope gone, the silver lining vanishes behind the clouds and noting will ever be the same.  I hate this phase of depression. One minute you are happy and the next second you remember something bad and duh, this is the end.

In depression there are good and bad days. In good days, you feel better because you are seeing a tiny piece of hope . The bad days are simply intolerable. You don’t understand what is really happening with you. You feel angry all the time. For me this state is a killer. It kills me and in return I want to kill people who are responsible for my depression. Sometimes the impulse to kill is so great that I become scared of my on self. I know killing is wrong and I would never do that but my brain doesn’t  understand that.

To be continued.

 
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Posted by on October 28, 2014 in depression, journal writing

 

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