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Monthly Archives: January 2015

Living with OCD entry #5

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Dear OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder),

It was never easy living with you. You entered at every phase and every moment of my life. You are like a companion. But you give a lot of trouble. Sometimes I think that it is my fault that I have let you grow and nourish inside my head. I watered you like you were some kind of plant in my brain. And when I tried to stop it was  too late. You were grown up by then and it was difficult to suppress you. I can control you sometimes but in tough situations I panic and you take control over me. Maybe if I don’t panic , I will have some control but my brain kinda stop working. It becomes almost impossible to stop you then.

I can’t take medicine because of the fear of getting addicted. I will try therapy and see what happens.

P.S. I beg you to leave me alone.

Yours,

Bariyah

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1 Comment

Posted by on January 21, 2015 in life with OCD, living with OCD, ocd

 

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Living with OCD entry #4

Dear Diary,

I am doing great for the past few days after the happy news of my admission. I topped the merit list. The depression hasn’t stuck me and I am quite relieved. But my OCD is still here. I think it won’t go away until I do the complete therapy.

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I can’t wear my “bad luck clothes”. They are the clothes that I was wearing when I heard some bad news. My OCD mind keeps telling me that if I wear them something bad will happen or worse, someone will die. This horrifies me. There is a pink sweater of me that I like very much but can’t wear because of this bad luck thing. Well, I can sacrifice my clothes if it prevents someone from dying. I know that sounds absurd but this is OCD. And this is the reason OCD is in one of the top ten disabling diseases.

That’s it for today, diary. I will see you later.

Yours truly,

Bariyah

 
3 Comments

Posted by on January 7, 2015 in living with OCD

 

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